Medusa

Can you listen to the whispers?
Within the freshly filled pages
What if I say “I do “?
I do ..do…I do..
Does it tingle within?
Hey tell me something
Is there any change of state?
In my honour, for myself
I unplug like never before
Uncoiled love
Breathe in air to new, new sails
Annoying love, interrupting
Butterflies of my thoughts
Ready to blow off the bridge
Oh will you hold me back
Oh help me, help me
To escape from myself
My, my, myself


No need to shove it on my face
Everyday every time
I can do it on my own
Back off, back it away
Put it on a back burner
My empty speeches
Deep within the core
Screen glow
Glows…glows…glows
Eh oh eh o ehh
Soaked eyes, mascara flow
Flows…flows…flows
Eh oh eh o ehh


Stuck in between speedy wheels
Will it take me back?
Back…back…back
Where my reasons
Will make some sense
Sense…sense…sense
In between
Annoying love, interrupting
While I cover up my reasons
Painfully quick
Quick…quick…quick
Ehh na nah nah nah ehh
Ehh na nah nah nah ehh


Can you listen to the whispers?
It echoes within eyes
Flows straight in my veins
Glass table, reflection of my face
Porcelain mug
Cries to hold you, touch you feel you
I’ll never, never
Like never again
Don’t want to make promises
In my soaked shoes
Ehh na nah nah nah
Hey tell me something
Will be there any change of state?
Ehh na nah nah nah ehh
Eh oh eh o ehh
Ehh na nah nah nah ehh…

 Inspired by Pearl Jam's "State of love and trust" and an evening spend with U.

All to tell a tale

Hole on the moon, images on my wall
Stains on my coat, wink in my eyes
My broken lamp and clock
All to tell a tale
Never mind it’s me again with my crossed self
Thirst in my thoughts, my treasured thoughts
My motionless walk, my goalless aims
Dark circles under my eyes
My numbness in my fingers
All to tell a tale
Words in my silence
My affection in my absence
My spontaneous heartbeat
Along empty sidewalks of my dream
Forever companion, my glasses
My empty canvas, ready to fold
My fragile toughness
All to tell a tale
My world revolves around your soul


My selfish plans, my treasured thoughts
Entangled between
What if…? If not
Wrote your name all over my blanket
Wrapped it around to hide myself
My bones my skin
All to tell a tale
Never mind it’s me again with my crossed self
Echoes of long lost smile
Shimmer of unforeseen hopes
My love for one, wince for others
My smile my tears, my anger my fears
My random plunge from my rooftop
There was hope there was life
All to tell a tale
Come rest beside me


Trying to chase down my shadow
My reasons, with no meanings
My gloom in between glow
Pilled up my love in a cradle
Pushed it over from a high place
Will it grow wings and fly away
Took the stairs to descend
It was tiring, I need some rest
All to tell a tale
Took out the portrait for a walk
Best portrait of my dreams
Sat beside the river bed, arms around it
Fondle my demands, my lust
All to tell a tale
Breathe with me or let me die

God needs help

High tides all over
No place to hide
It’s no time to sit aside
Loss of values from Himalayas
Up till the oceans
As leads fly all over
Bodies fall one after another
Silence fills in between
Violence and cries
Millions of innocent, burnt and buried
Memories lost within grey layers of time
God needs help
She is in danger
She’s drowning in tears of millions
Getting buried under expectations
Of thousand deprived souls


Killings in the name of democracy
Crime in the name of love
As our Kings turn to demons
Eats away into poor man’s life
She’s in pain
To see her children
Slit throats of one another
She can’t take it any more
As we pollute her name
For sake of our petty religion
For our paltry social divisions
Hatred in our voice
Has left her with no choice
Let us be good to give her a chance to heal
Let us be good
Feel for her pain


My God, our God
Falling from her place
Broken and wasted
God needs help
She is in pain
Let us be good to give her a chance to heal
Let us heal our hearts
To save her
It will take a little bit of trying
It will take a little bit of understanding
A bit of love and a bit of compassion
Let us douse our ego
Erase all boundaries
She needs us to be good
God needs our help

The Queen of my City

Under dim lights of my city streets
There stands a woman with a purpose
With a grin in her smile
And an anxiety on her face
As her cloths sticks to her skin
She takes some steps towards the road
Her instincts are real perfect
Oh she looks ready like any other night
She’s crazy and she wants to get wild
Under pale lights of my city
Myriad gaze falls upon her
But she’s not bothered
As she’s quite sure about her


A car stopped near her
She bends over the window
And the engine roared in the dark
She’s quite sure of her
As she fixed her price with a smile
In the backseat there’s the king for tonight
He will rule her as he likes
Same old scream and grin
Will roll back like every other night
She spends her day in dust of disarray
As dusk calls in another night
Reflection of her face on her mirror
Oh, there she is
The Queen of my city, ready to go
On the road again


She gives in to a man’s libido
Night after night
As sweat pours from all her pores
She remembers her old man
Her dolls and her little red cloak
She was her daddy’s girl
A little girl with dreams
To be a woman someday
Now no one sees her as a woman
Does she feels herself to be?
All that remains are scars in and out
From a violent night out
And she smiles and says
“I’m an entertainer, a star
I’m the Queen of my city”

17 minus 10

I’ll teach the time to run back
It’s easy to do so
When you are numb
Tame the sun not to glow
Days will be low and slow
No reasons to toil
My grooves and ridges
Memories cross a lame bridge
I killed a man down the road
Took his heart made of gold
Found a picture of a girl
Marked her head with a gun
She’s dead after all


One more day go
Like many other it was slow
Ticks gone mute for me
Nothing to waste or seek
Lived another day in tatters
Light is in your hand, spare some
As I get scared when it’s dark
Took some water, mixed with lemon
Round in circles, round in circles, round in circles
How it felt? I think I’m dead
She’s dead after all
All the same


World may be a stage
I’m no actor, just a slave
I appreciate your concern
Say your plan, I’ll lick and wag
And think it’s mine, all the way
Life is safe in between two rails
And between skin and a pin
So you think, you can teach something
17 minus 10
She’s dead after all
Seven
All the same
Reservoir of pain

To be Continued...

Nothing to give or take
Nothing to smile or cry
Just a blank page
In an old notebook
Lying in dust
Of my faults and sighs
Pain and glory all
Washed in morning dew
Something crawls all over you
All around back and forth
No noise or silence
No sorry or thank you
No reasons or answers
No me around you
All seems so easy to say
All seems so hard to try
What if I say I love you
And need you
More than anyone do
Will you give me
Reasons not to do so
And ask to leave all that I do


No new dawn to breathe
No new boat to catch
An old raincoat hangs on
My raincoat dotted with holes
Don’t know who shot me
What hit me to the core?
From inside deep inside
Things gone wrong
Very wrong
Taking red pills, one at a time
It promise
To kill pain for a while
Die die die, my heart
You’ll never have to cry
And nothing can rip
You apart, when you
Die die die
Forgive me if I can’t be
What you want me to ?
Hope tomorrow’s morning
Brings new joy to you


I’ll sleep sleepless nights
I’ll stare at you
With a gazeless stare
Will love you in a
Dreamless dream
Whats a dream without you?
Like a child without cries
And rich foods without hunger
Hand in hand
In front of my eyes
Currents shifts me
Far away, away from you
What if I say I love you
And need you
More than anyone do
Will you give me
Reasons not to do so
And ask to leave all that I do

My Lady in White

You lie in my pocket
Wrapped in a white packet
With a promise to make
Me forget to cry
I take you out as I know not
What to do and whom to blame?
For my anger and my pain
You hang yourself in between my lips
To relieve me little by little
As I breathe in my pain
You are my friend my ghost
My goodbye my end


I see my city lights to glow
Glow as stars attached to a pole
You burn you glow
And guide me through
Dark nights when I’m all alone
In between my fingers
You flow, I think of her
And you glow again
I know you’ll never go and leave me alone
In this perfect world of her
What to say? I’m dumb once again


My lady never lied to me
Promised me re-life
Life and death
I find it hard enough to realize
That there’s no reason
To take you away from me
Bring me sleep
As I kiss u goodbye
Wake me up with your smell
In your end
And in my regret

It's not a love story

It’s a story of a boy and a girl
Though I’m afraid it’s not a story of love
The boy fell in love
Got to his knees
And said “I love you”
She said he was the one
He dreamt of their happy days
And they flew high
Like birds in the northern sky
Over the fields and willow


She took his heart
Left it all alone in a midnight quarrel
Threw him out of her life
Though it was never easy on her
He tried to sip down, her memory
But it was never enough
To make him forget
So he packed his bag
And left for the unknown


No one heard from him again
No one knows where he left
No call or letters
Got lost like an old dream
In the garden of time
He now just lives on
In memories
Of his family and friends


Now she finds love
In someone else’s arms
And she says “I’m happy”
But at nights she hears
His voice calling her name
From far away
Sees him run his fingers
Through her hair
And kiss her cheeks many times
His love lives on
In her dreams, Unknowing
She carried it with her
Till her last day
It was a story of a boy and a girl
Though I’m afraid it was not a story of love

Signature of my Ghost

Broken thread
Once again
Beads all over the place
Being chased by a hearse
Pulled by horses
Thoughts fail to escape
I’ll be, I’ll be there
Once again
6 inches away
To fill up your sinuses


Red green in between
I fill up, that’s not
Do i have to stare?
Your face
It’s invisible, irresistible
My thoughts, even flow
Lives on, forever
Even at the end


New dawn new day
They say new ways
Are here to stay
I see no change
In my time
Just for your sake
Sliding away
With the waves
Far away


See through
My Smoke
It’s here to stay
When you’re not near
Sketched your face
On the clouds
Saw it pour down
Through my eyes
Reasons not known
Oh my eyes, your face
It’s all red

He & I

He’s just a man
With no face or name
Sitting on his chair
Head crowded with
Who? and why ?
Many die and many cry
In front of him
Several times
But he doesn’t move or sigh
How much is enough for him?
Will he forever sit and watch
As the story unfolds
Several times


Digging deep to hide away from the truth
Covers himself with fake
Thoughts of “I’m fine, I’ll be safe”
Far away from all the cries
But to whatever depth he goes
The heat will follow him to his hole
Melt his shield and left him alone
And he’ll be standing naked
Right in front of the truth


He feels the fear
Right in front of him
He feels the fear deep inside
But he is happy living blind
He’s just like you and me
Will he not speak out?
Until his own tears soaks his cloth
Will he not see the writings on the wall?
Until his face gets painted
With his deepest fear


He’s just a man
With my face and my name
Sitting on a chair
Head crowded with
Who? and why ?
Many die and many cry
In front of me
Several times
But I don’t move or sigh
How much more is enough for me?
Will I forever sit and watch?
As the story unfolds
Several times

Heartfelt

The news is just out
And it’ll never be the same
Between you and me
I don’t want you to care for me
I don’t want you to tell me more lies
I don’t know why I say all this
May be because you are the one, whom I miss
I was there when you needed the most
You didn’t even call to know
I’m still breathing or not
So why you quit on me ?
Why you quit on me ?


I don’t want you to question me
That why I’m acting like this
I don’t want you to believe
That I’m not all right
I don’t want you to sacrifice
As that was always my part
I don’t want you to feel
That I’m left all by my own
Is it you or is it me I’m not sure
Who is burning down the bridge today?
So why you quit on me ?
Why you quit on me ?


I never thought that it’ll turn up
The way it has at the end
What about your words?
You said they were from your heart
Now what I see
All that lies in the dust
I was there to soak up your little blues
To hold you back
When you were about to sing your last lullaby
So why you quit on me ?
Why you quit on me ?


With each passing tick the room is getting
Wider than ever before
I don’t want you to collect the dust
From all those old memories
As I walk around
With my pockets filled with them
But I don’t know why
Now it’s too hard to carry any more mile
Is it you or is it me I’m not sure
Who is burning down the bridge today?
So why you quit on me ?
Why you quit on me ?

Minutes to my last rites

The air that I breathe has turned black
Riding low on my broken luck
Nothing under my control
Cast away by torrid waves
Destined to turn up at locked doors & stoned walls
Crucified my past on a golden cross
Collecting broken pieces of my wretched soul
Took my chances to resurrect it all


Some half-burned images roll up the cream
Without the cherry to cherish
Ate up this triangular meat ball
What it gave? Only pain and tear
Tattooed everything I was & I’ll ever be
Piled up enough fuel for my pyre
Let it burn, higher it goes
Hope that the smoke knocks at your window


Don’t need any Barbie, Unicorn
Pegasus or any Tom & Jerry
Give me a claymore
Glimpses of your new king on the horizon
I’ll make the sun go down, painted in black
Fix you in a fight with demons
Demons you gifted me


Empty canvas of clay lies in front
Let there be some color
Or even blood will do
Painting my own death bed
Welcome you all to my end
Trail of a new beginning awaits
A cry of a child
Or a demon waiting to run amok

The fog of sin & survival

One night I dreamt of a castle. A castle named forbidden territory on a mountain top covered by sulphur smoke and the mountain named, “Mount Hate breeder”. Still I hoped to unlock its doors though the signboard outside says “Beware of wolves and jackals”. By some strange intervention I unlocked the door I entered, as the sound of knell greeted me I looked around just to find puppet stores, puppets which had no face and as I walked on, a banner caught my eyes “Puppets of all shape and size Easily programmable, strings of hatred, jealously & dishonesty governs them, Buy one get whole family free” As if rotten seed gave rise to rotten yield. Here “camouflage is the shield”, and “intimacy, the sword”. All of them stared at me and I felt like a prey caught in the middle of a spider web. Their strange wobbly stare made me numb, it felt like that is better to stand on a mine than to fly in false sugary words of concern. I walked deeper inside the castle, various puppet shows caught my sight with different plots, and different characters but they all have the same motive to just cheat, or steal and Kill to survive. I tried to find the master of the show but I failed to do so. Then I came across a dust-bin where old & broken puppets were dumped all looked the same, all looked as if there was no more space left in their wooden body to fill it up with sins I continued my search for the master of these shows but oh no its 7’o clock. The alarm ringed as I woke up.. the dream faded as I spent a hectic day, met many people, saw & felt many things. I watched my surroundings, the dream flashed back…… puppets here & puppets there!. I don’t know what was inside them as I didn’t show what was inside me. Late that night as I rewind my day, the dream again flashed back I tried to remain in reality but it was just a fine line between the dream and the reality. The puppets of my dream now have faces, yes they did. Now I recognized each & every one of them. The obvious question came…Are we all puppets or is it just my cynic vision? Though the mystery remains till today…….
WHO IS THE MASTER OF PUPPETS?

Tunes of my life

You are my wings
Let me fly
Oh yeah around in circles
And above this crowd
You are my light
Let me see
All the good things that surrounds me
In this big hard world
You are my face
Let it get painted with smile
A joyful smile
Oh yeah all around me
You are my dream
Let it never end
And I weave my life around it
You are my journey
Let it have no destination
Want to walk down a thousand mile
Just to see you there
Just to feel you right here




You are my blanket
In a cold afternoon
As I hold on to the moment
Let the time stop ticking
And I freeze in the warmth of your touch
In your heart I wish
There’s some room left
To lay myself in peace
With you within same frame
It is so fine and young
Without you within me
I’m just a troubled one
You make me crazy indeed
And I want to stay just like this
I don’t want to keep score
What I lost and what I need
As I have agreed to the fact
That I need you
To be free

Moonlight

Left alone on this piece of paper
Green noise pink sky
Cover me don’t let me cry
Nowhere to leave
Waves are high
Too high to fly
It’s too late to sigh
For all my sins
There will be no angel to greet
To wash me and purify


No one comes at my yell
No one comes to raise my veil
No one to disturb my silence
No one to push from my place
As I view this moon
Through my caged life
Why it’s shining?
Maybe laughing loud at my plight
Within layers of my life
There’s nothing much to hide
Why then I fear?


What I breathe? Is not meant for me
Wrapped in a plastic
Left out in sun
Guess my wounds would dry
What about my pains?
Would you hold my hand?
And take me through this sand
Imprints will remain
Do remember imprints remains


Faces of dunes
What’s left to do?
What’s left to say?
Don’t let them come close
Or I’ll melt I’ll flow
Wild breeze here it comes
New plot new scheme
Do I stand a chance?
Wow I melt and flow
It’s time to douse myself in this dusk
What else can I do?
It’s better to be the sound
That faints beneath the depths of a well
Than to ring within someone’s brain

Guardian of my sleep

I saw a dream today
Seems my life is going to change
I lost them in a maze
All my wealth and all my pain
Guardian of my sleep had a tortured face
Took me to the other side
Wicked eyes devoured my heart
Underneath my bed there was that snake
Bite me to my grave, to my grave
Oh what a shame !
Joy of the day turned to dust
Hourglass spun around
I traveled through endless time
All I saw coming was me, old and grey
Ready to sod off


I saw a dirty game today
Oh I can play it better than them
I was not the king today
Just a man at the stick end
Ready to get the beat
Dust and pain dust and pain
Oh what a shame !
I was not the star today oh yeah
Just a common block
Lying at the wrong end of the stack
Put it in and brought it out
Oh what a feel!


I lost all my keys today
That pill played its part well
I was not the same man there
Someone was there with my name
I was locked inside a little box
Men with rabid souls gathered all around
To sketch my future yeah
I was destined to suffer and decay
Oh what a shame !


Hopes were low and dim
All it needed was one last ring
Now I try to trick out the charade
Are these made up to hide my laden reality?
Or they are here just to fill and spill
who I’m? Where I’m? What’s wrong?
Is there any change?
Try to fix my paths again
to the real side of the river
flowing right down the middle of my brain

Cynical

I have a story to tell
It’s me and my doubts again
Horses at my tip
Let no pretty noose
Spoil it all over again
In a sack with a loaded gun
Wasted and soaked
In a cup of doubt


What is wrong? I don’t know
Back to being a total unknown
I believe no one
I doubt you all
I’m a cynic
Oh God help me
I don’t want
Want a bad name


I’m done
Overdone, overcooked
Screwed and fixed
Left staring down at the barrel
As smokes from last shot
Chokes my breath
I’m dressed and ready
To take my bullet
I want to feel I want to feel yeah
As dead as I can

Love go way
Make some place
Caring oh yeah!!
I smoked it out
Friendship is a pretty bullet
I swallowed at one go
I’m no friend, no enemy
Just a known face
Sick and tired maybe
On the verge to fade away
Yeah away
From your memory


What’s wrong again?
I’m back in the court again
Stack up some lies
As I doubt you all
Don’t know will I ever
Find some respite
From these doubts again

Pulp

Something crawls something hides
On my skin its back again
I feel, I fear
It’s cold and moist
Oh I can feel again!!
Some words, some lines
Sometimes at night
Someone sometime
Feels like mine


My dear my friend
Do you have some time?
Some time to spend on me
Take a look
There are plans in there
I don’t know where to find
I tremble and fright

Something gives way
To someone to fill
You are the one
Empty spaces calls on
Sometime someone
Streams down from my eyes


Someone turns away
Something holds me back
Something breathes and something dies
What it eats?
Sometime cries sometime laughs
Jumps and crawls
Something never returns

Confession

On a freeway
Driving on
Headlight is off
I don’t care who is in front
Running away from myself
In search of someone else
Yesterday has gone
Now it’s like a stone
I have to drag it all along


Facing the truth
Nowhere to run
Trying to soak
Soak in the stare
Trying to fake to please them all
Can you hear me?
Cobain
I’m a fake after all

Thankful to my God
I don’t believe in
For all that I have
And all that I’ll get
Never complained
About my state
Maybe I’m too spineless
To change it all
Or too tired
To fight my way
Through these pages
Telling the same old song


Dreams doesn’t matter
Reality is that black hole
Now I’m just a packaged one
Would you buy me?
And take me home
Can you afford?
The truth, of who I’m

Tooth Brush

Torn pages dirty floor
Smelly skin morning comes
This sun is too bright
Give me a dull one
Coffee goes down as easy
As I’m dead


Tattooed soul and scattered feelings
Sticks to the window glass
Last night’s moon in bruised sky
Raped stars and broken doorknob
Holy war with bonded dreams
Waiting for a strawberry bowl
Desires knocks at my door


Last night’s words
Lies flat on my cover
Yesterday was purple
Today is blue
Take a look at me today
I’m not whom you know
I’m a crowned skull now
Ready to live alone


A blue day shattered by a stone
I’m that stone
That doesn’t roll
Don’t hate don’t push
Stay away don’t come close
Stay away
Don’t come close

Standing on a pin head

Too steady to drop down
Too wobbly to stand tall
Too stubborn to confess
Too strong to cry
Too happy to feel sad
Too down to rejoice
Too doubtful to feel safe
Too protected to be endangered
Too many questions without answers
Too many conclusions without statements
Too many doubts without reasons
Too many reasons without logic
Too skin-deep to hang on
Too rooted to move on
Too bright to gaze
Too dark to identify
Too shallow to drown
Too deep to survive
Too important it must be tattooed
Too glossy it must be wiped
Too much U within me
Too much of everything
At the tip of this pin

Love or Hate

Caught in between
Dark and bright
Walking empty streets
With dirty lanes and painted alleys
As some thoughts spins around
Taking me back
Back to my end again


Love or hate
I’ll make my choice
Live my life or take it away
There is no point now
To come down from this cloud
Took my time
To decide my path
What is new? What is old?
Everything now is turning round and round


Took some pill
Went to bed
As gravels of my dream
Buried your face
Buried your existence
Down and out
With nothing left
Empty boxes
Memorabilia of broken promises


Love or hate
I’ll make my choice
Live my life or take it away
There is no point now
To come down from this cloud
Took my time
To decide my path
What is new? What is old?
Everything now is turning round and round

Q&A

What you do when there are no more stones to throw?
Take a look around at what you have changed
What you do when there is no more air left to breathe?
Yeah take a look at that old tree by the riverside
What you do when there is no more stairs to climb?
Measure the height of that tower meant to stand tall


What you do when there are no more words to say?
That old diary still remains with blank pages in it
What you do when there is no more smile to fake?
Give a penny to that little girl at the corner of the street
What you do when there are no more places to visit?
Switch-off the lights, take a deep look inside


What you do when there are no more prayers left?
Light up a candle as hope knows no end
What you do when there are no more questions left?
Gather all the answers and put them into the shelve
What you do when there are no more dreams to transcend?
Take a long vacation you need some rest


What you do when there is no one left to love?
Look at your childhood picture
Kiss it to feel young and beautiful again

Goodbyee

Trying to write a perfect song
About you my dear
Trying to capture the moments past
Snapshots on my mirror
Writing old pains
On canvas of this young night
As morning is far to come
I’m here, right here
Waiting for your murky sight


How far you are?
How far you can go?
Are you happy my friend?
Don’t say no
Ride on the good times
Hope your butterflies
Don’t turn to mosquitoes


Take some measure
It’s going to rain
That printed umbrella, still remains in its place
How many bodies does it cover today?
Same as on 24th of May


What it gives and what it does?
To my mind, I have no clue
Thunder and rainbow clashes on
Ride on the good times my dear
A fistful of sunshine from my dark room
All I can gift you, all that I have.

Sounds from within

There you are sitting in a hole
You have created a wall
Within you and outside your door
Your head grew heavy and you feel dizzy
Sounds of unknown origin calls you
As you get oblivious of your surrounding
You look in the mirror to re-recognize yourself
Maybe its you or maybe its just an image
Tortured by uncontrollable feelings of nothingness
You chase after dreams and desires unsatisfied
You ride a roller-coaster moving out of pattern
As insignificant thoughts tie you down
And the bacteria inside decomposes your life through slow decay




Don’t just sit and fool around
As nobody tells you when to run
At the end when you realize its time to move on
You are old and weak and one day closer to the end
Throw open the window wide
And let myriad fragrance of life to flow
As outside the grass is greener
And the light is brighter
With smiling faces of friends waiting to carry you
To a place of untouched heights and unforgettable wonders